Alone
A Heavy storm appeared water dripping in the ceiling, branches crashes in the sides of the cabin firm wind burst inside the cabin, the man startled and awaken from his slumber. He crawl slowly to the side of the cabin he peek outside and notice the Storm, The man feels lonely but he wasn’t alone there was Rats crawling, gathering food. The man starve he was keen to find food, he peek for the second time if there's any food that he can eat, he saw an apple tree it was full of apples but it was bitter outside. He expect that the Storm will disappear really soon, as the man is waiting he look around the cabin, he felt so tired he fall asleep.
In the Morning he woke up the sun is shining bird singing the walked out from the cabin, he decided to find food. The Man hike in the open meadow, he went to a forest and found a camping site, the man call out if theirs people. The People walked outside their tents and saw the man standing with filthy clothes.A Woman provide clean clothes the Man and a Child gave the Man food.The Man was happy that he found this Camp site, A Family decided that the man can stay with them until they found a home for the Man.
W.A.L.T-Generate an attribute chart to develop and sort ideas and details for descriptive writing
What I found hard: I found it hard to show not tell but I did my best.
What I found easy: Imagine what happen to the man in the cabin
What I could do next time: Put a image and more colors.
Hi Nathan,
ReplyDeleteAwesome story. I like how the man went to sleep and it was a lovely day. Why did you make this story?
Prudence,
Yaldhurst Model School
Kia ora Nathan,
ReplyDeleteYou have used very descriptive words that creates a playing movie in my mind and I really enjoyed the story.
Next time I think that you could check over your spelling because some of the words I don't quite understand.
Everything else you have put alot of effort into that has created something wonderful.
Kind Regards
Julia
Yaldhurst Model School
This comment has been removed by the author.
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Deletehi Nathan, you have a good story and where family let him stay until they found a home for him, that was nice, if you want you can come and look at my blog, http://pwsvtearanui.blogspot.co.nz/
ReplyDeleteThank you Te Aranui,I will visit your blog when I have time and comment on your work.Once again thank you.
ReplyDelete